How to Start

I can’t quite put my finger on it yet, but there’s something profoundly helpful about approaching a daunting task by starting slow. Whether it's a 10-mile run or your nighttime skincare routine, the moment I feel resistance, I give myself permission to start slow, and all of sudden - I feel capable of accomplishing the task (or at least starting it.)

Then once you complete the first step of a task (or the first 5 minutes of a long run), your body starts to relax. Without fail, it feels like the apprehension or the friction that was initially there at the start is no longer. You can let the natural momentum that's been unlocked carry you through, hopefully to the end.

Start Slow

Upon listening to a recent episode of The Happiness Lab, I learned that Malcolm Gladwell and I share a similar disdain for the phrase “It's the journey, not the destination.” Malcolm describes that there are many things we as humans do for the destination and not the journey, like climbing a mountain or running a marathon (aka Type 2 fun). A long-time runner himself - he’s been running for 50 years(!) - he says that every time he goes running, he has the same psychological experience, which is "I don’t really want to do it.” He explains that he runs almost solely for the feeling afterward.

I was honestly surprised to hear an avid runner of 50 years admit that he encounters friction before every run. “It’s 32 degrees out." or "It’s windy." - were excuses I thought only went through MY head. However, he says that the best way to bust through that initial friction is to start slow. 

Indeed all runners know that a classic rookie mistake in a race is to start out too fast. You start out too fast, you’ll burn yourself out and you may not be able to finish. The best method is to start slow, slower than you think you need to - maybe even exaggerate the slowness. This ensures that you have the energy that will carry you through the race.

It's almost a revolutionary act in this frenetic paced life to start something slow with thoughtfulness and presence of mind, but I assure you that when you approach tasks in this manner, you'll find you enjoy them more. Be the tortoise. Resist the impulse to rush through something mindlessly just to get it done sooner; you'll most likely end up disappointed. And if just getting to the starting line is your barrier, it's important to appreciate the fact that . . .

Starting is the Hardest Part

It’s like when my favorite online yoga teacher says at the start of practice: "The hardest part is already behind you.” i.e. you committing to your decision to do yoga, rolling out your mat, and starting the video. How many times have you quit a workout already underway? I can think of maybe 1 or 2 times. But how many times have you quit a workout before it even started? MANY times. Driving past the gym or flopping on your couch instead of rolling out the yoga mat? Guilty. The most friction is encountered at the start. 

Almost every night I wait until I’m pretty tired to do my nighttime skincare routine and almost every night, I think to myself “I’m too tired; I’m gonna skip it.” But then I inevitably decide that I will at least complete the first step - floss. I allow myself to walk very slowly into the bathroom (mimicking a tortoise of course) and focus on the first (and only) task at hand. Once I get the flossing done, I inevitably finish the routine. Every single time. Why? Because the hardest part is behind me. The rest is as easy as rolling a ball downhill.

Keep the momentum

For my fellow science nerds, I liken the initial friction at the start of a task or project to activation energy - the minimum amount of energy needed to start a chemical reaction. All chemical reactions, even exothermic (reactions that release energy), require energy to activate the reaction. You have to muster up that little bit of energy it takes to start. But once you muster up that activation energy, it's all downhill from there - in a good way.

This reminds me of my favorite hacks from Atomic Habits - habit stacking. It's one way to implement a new habit by “stacking” it after or before a habit you already do, to provide you with a cue to do the new habit. This also harnesses the understanding that accomplishing one habit can give you sense a of success or momentum to accomplish another habit. This "stacking" takes advantage of the natural momentum that comes from accomplishing one task or habit, making the next task that much easier.

Faced with an overwhelming task or project? Or maybe you have anxiety about meeting a new friend for coffee.

1) Commit to starting / commit to the meeting.

2) Start slow. Be present.

have fun.